Surprised By Sadness

When I read Philippians 2:25-30 recently, I was surprised to notice a theme of sadness. Not only had Epaphroditus been distressed (v.26), but also Paul is dealing with multiple layers of sorrow (v.27). In v.28, Paul tells the Philippians that by sending Epaphroditus, he will become less sorrowful: even though Paul's emphasis is certainly on the word "less," the point remains that Paul was still dealing with at least some level of sorrow. The whole situation reminds me of Phil. 1:30, where Paul tells the Philippians that he is suffering and speaks of "the conflict" that is in him. These sections of Philippians reveal that Paul is struggling with pain and suffering on a deep, personal level.

The underlying strata of sadness surprised me because I typically picture Paul as a non-stop happiness machine. There's a reason for this stereotype: in the verse immediately after the sorrowful section, Paul commands the Philippians to "Rejoice in the Lord." (Incidentally, this is what I forgot to do a few days ago, when I was exhausted, too busy, and dealing with a computer breakdown apocalypse.) Obviously, Paul wouldn't tell the Philippians to do something that he himself wasn't doing--and we know from 1:18 and 2:17-18 that Paul is indeed rejoicing. This suggests two things to me.

First, whereas happiness and sorrow are opposites, joy and sorrow can apparently coexist. This seems to imply that there's some sort of difference between joy and happiness, and that superficial bubblyness is not the goal. Second, when I am confronted with days that are full of sorrow, my responsibility is not to deny the pain; rather, it is to rejoice in the Lord. I don't know exactly how you can rejoice in the midst of pain, but I'm pretty sure that it's something we can't do by ourselves. It takes a lot of prayer.